Taking in the laundry..a gecko rushed frantically away from me, as i reached for the sheet on the fencing. Poor soul..it didn't know i meant no harm. Anyone who knows me could tell that gecko, i would never deliberately harm. But perhaps it thought i may harm it by accident? I can't be sure.
All i do know is that gecko reminded me of so many people i have met in this lifetime..who shrink away from a meaningful encounter. From a relationship. From an opportunity. From a second chance. Because like that little panicked gecko..they are wary from memories of the past. Or avoiding the uncertainties of the future. Scarred by what has been and by imaginary could be's - they merely react. And never truly give themselves a chance to respond to what's contained in the NOW.
Yet just like i understood that gecko, i understand their panic. I am no longer hurt when another rejects me, or runs the other way. I understand now that it's never truly about me or against me. I need not feel hurt..not by a panicky gecko, not by a judgemental stranger, not by a distant friend nor an angry lover. Instead, now when someone runs away or rejects me..i see a gecko. I accept they have some form of pain. Accept that there is no need to judge them or myself. Accept that there is no need to become defensive..but to simply honour the other's need for time to heal and move on. I think this was one of the greatest acts of kindness given to me when i was a gecko not too long ago..and i am glad to now pass on the love.
Original post on Facebook Fan Page on Sunday, 22 August 2010
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