There is no failure. Only feedback.

“Memories are reminders of what God has done and where we could have done better.” ~ Ravi Zacharias

Reading this is intimidating to me. It makes me feel that memories are scary things..like a strict old school teacher who brandishes the cane instead of encouragement for mistakes made. I have no problem with the God bit. It’s not hard for me to believe that the Universe, a Higher Force, the Great Spirit – whatever you relate to most - does have a hand in our days. It is looking at what I could have done better that I have an issue with. That disciplinarian approach to life. It feels highly judgmental. It carries a wrong versus right, good guy versus bad guy connotation that I no longer feel is the truth of my world after all.

What if all that I could have done better was exactly what I needed, so that I could be where I am right now? Given my unique set of circumstances and life experiences, what exactly is 'better'? Do I compare to my own standards or someone else’s? The fact that I made a judgement call in the past and that I have come this far must mean that I did what best I could AT THAT POINT IN TIME. Why even revisit that moment to salvage working parts? The way I see it, if I can look at the same situation and see a different path from the one I took – it means I have grown or changed or evolved somewhat. So it also follows that my past decisions could never have been better because I would not have been the wiser me now, back then.

I see no point in looking back in judgement. Today is all I have. Tomorrow, some events today would have helped me evolve even more.. enabling me to make different decisions for the same situation I meet today because tomorrow.. I will be wiser than today. So I can never really use yesterday's scenarios as a truly worthy yardstick for my tomorrows. By tomorrow, most if not all, the possible variables in the situation would have changed, including me.

I think I would rather go by the belief that “There is no failure. Only feedback.” I am more comfortable with that. It’s encouraging. It’s building. It’s affirming. And most of all it’s freeing. My memories then become fuel that I can easily burn up and use to power up my todays. They have no hidden regret or guilt attached to them. What I could have done better in the past then just becomes a neutral experiment, an experience, which provides me with relevant feedback. So I don’t get hung up on the fact that I made a bad choice then and need to avoid more bad choices in the future. Instead, I can wake up every morning truly believing it’s a brand new day, just like the day I was born because I no longer ever need to fear making bad choices. After all, there is no failure. Only feedback.